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headband magnifier with LED light and dick

June 22, 2021 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

I walked in on Ross naked, leaning into an open window to catch the sun’s light on medical grade tweezers, as he slowly peeled skin away from twenty splinters, five of which were causing infections. He called me over in excitement, never once looking my way, sparing me the blinding glare from the headlight on his magnifying visor. He was focused, yet eager to show me every area on his hand causing pain. I enjoy watching Ross take care of […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: dating, first date, love

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every day

April 26, 2021 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

Is the same. I get shocked when I touch anything metal because the air is dry and the mobile home is carpeted in reddish-brown polyester, the sofa is covered in dark brown polyester, the cat sleeps in light brown polyester, and the dog sleeps in polyester the same color as the sofa’s polyester. Even the zucchini shocked me today. (Because I had to walk on polyester carpet to get to it, and it was resting on aluminum foil.) I wear […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: breakup, desert, electrons, love, stars

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ikey

May 6, 2019 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

Ikey is short, fit, and comfortable with flirting while using his Jewish mom impersonation. He knows how to dance and hasn’t in a year and a half. Within a few hours of knowing him I want to be a part of his life. I know he’s recruiting because I was there when he told Arlo “I think I’m looking for wifey.” I don’t want to be wifey; I do want to be around: a face at a party, a recent […]

Categories: secrets • Tags: crush, dance, future, love, vintage

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stripes & stench

April 15, 2019 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

I walk into the bedroom to find the bed’s been made. My new sequins mermaid snuggie from T.J.Maxx is laid out over the gravity blankets. Arlo reversed some of the sequins to make a heart. I smiled and took a picture. * * * It’s been awhile since a guy has made my bed. Not that long, really. A month or so. Spud used to make it every day even though I told him not to. He stopped shortly before […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: breakup, friendship, love, sex, skunk, sugar baby, sugar baby. sugar daddy, sugar dating

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last session

February 19, 2019 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

Today I lost the Jason I used to have. The Jason I used to have would text me several times a day to see how my day was going. The Jason I used to have would get upset with me for countless reasons: leaving his apartment for mine when we were upset, joking about cancer, crying like a kitten to see if the cat he was watching would react, being dishonest about who I was talking to, and giving him […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: breakup, love, Oakland, therapy

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unexpected

December 27, 2018 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

Most people speak when they’re on a video call. We were an exception. We stared at each other. We mimed. I made one silly face and as a symptom of him stifling his laughter, he farted. We waited, wide-eyed and quiet. Would his son wake up? I was video calling a father who was sleeping in his son’s bed…while his son was in it, sleeping. I was video calling a husband who was days away from finding out he would […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: friendship, limbo, love, relationships

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a couple of whys

September 2, 2018 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

I stare at you because you amaze me. Most of the time there’s no expression on my face because I’m deep in wonder…wondering where you came from, wondering what’s going on in your mind, wondering why we do what we do to each other. Now that I know I stare, I’ve been shifting my glance and/or smiling if I do want to stare, as requested. Both shifting my glance and/or smiling breaks my train of thought. I’m not sure I […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: feelings, life, love, love letter, questions, relationships, thoughts

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it’s been almost two years

August 13, 2018 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

since I’ve posted anything here. Life has been different. I’m not dating multiple people. I’m not having sex in exchange for writing material and car payments. I’m not thinking about just myself. I’ve been in love and completely preoccupied with changing to make the love easier. Because it’s been HARD — insanely hard — something’s not right hard — why are you doing this? hard — and I’m still here — WE’RE still here — you’re kinda still here… & […]

Categories: Uncategorized • Tags: love, therapy, twin flames

2

the end

August 26, 2016 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

She showed me the phone. “Tell her the Moon is saying goodnight for the last time. She’ll know what it means. ;)” Jason looked at me. He saw my face go white and put his hand on my thigh to console me. After we dropped her off we talked about finding dead bodies and witnessing car wrecks, fragility, and what driving around at 3am three nights a week because you can’t sleep does to your spirit. “I’m going to cry….is […]

Categories: secrets • Tags: goodnight, heartache, love, Moon, relationships

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working through it

August 25, 2016 by whatwhippedcreamismadeof

Jason’s gotten into the habit of reading through my text conversations with boys. He reads them likes school literature: critiquing them afterwards, probing for background, eager (and reluctant) to inquire about future character development. I hate it and I’ve gotten used to it. The invasion of privacy makes me feel like I’m cared for…in a rehab kind of way. Someone who knows me well and knows where I’ve been, sees me going down a path that could lead somewhere not so great, […]

Categories: secrets, Uncategorized • Tags: ghosts, love, relationships

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