Today I lost the Jason I used to have.
The Jason I used to have would text me several times a day to see how my day was going. The Jason I used to have would get upset with me for countless reasons: leaving his apartment for mine when we were upset, joking about cancer, crying like a kitten to see if the cat he was watching would react, being dishonest about who I was talking to, and giving him back his keys.
The Jason I used to have would take me places: Costco, Japan, camping…every pho restaurant in Oakland.
The Jason I used to have would piss me off every single day for the last six months of our relationship, and do it well, the way he does everything.
The Jason I used to have did not share my humor. He was giggly with his friends and kept his newest friend, the one he giggled with the most, a secret.
He doesn’t hide her anymore because he’s not in love with me any longer.
Though there’s still love.
And we talked about it. For fifty minutes. For $65 each.