logging off

“I had never felt you so warm. this morning i was freezing for some unknown reason and you draped your body on top of mine.  limb by limb i felt your heat rapidly spreading over me.  Your flesh is always so theraputic.  I awoke soon after your flesh had completely fused with my own as i found you to be gone and no longer to the side of me.  you put me in such a state.  a few tears were tasted.  i simply adore it that there is no one i can dependo on to bring me to complete rubble.  i have never even dreamed of loving another.  I saw us in two pakistanie boys the other day in a documentary they were completely devoted to eachother, they wouldnt admit that one was better than the other in anything at all. they were sad when they werent able to play together, both worried about the other immensely, not that they would be hurt but that they wouldnt die together.  Made martyrs by the israelis.  made me smile. I want to forever be imperfect with you, when i grow ill of seeing my own image i can merely slightly move my eyes to yours and forget every bad thought that has ever wedged itself into my skull crippling my way of being.  You make me see straighter than i have ever seen.  You turn down the volume on all that is unworthy of us.  there is nothing but us.  It pains me terribly that others would like to see things differently.  i cant brush them off so easily as i cant always perceive my true worth.  and at times feel that you will see things their way and not mine.  I fear not death, unemployment, failure, or any other dreadful notions, i only fear the loss of your love.  You know how much i care, and you know how much i need. its been written time and time again.  never once was it not meant.  we shall dine together soon, alone for the first time, truly alone with eachother, with no small children pestering either of us, no need for the closing of doors.  i think thats why the idea of laying down with you in our rooms and not doing anything apeals to me more and more.  Its as if we are living together playing over and over again the ten minutes or so that we have together before leaving eachother for the outside world.  only to return to our true purpose in life to support eachother and make eachother feel bored, annoyed, frustrated, loved, jealous, ashamed, angry, beautiful.  I will enjoy our microcosym, and smile knowing others will never experience these specific blissfull moments. I will say good night to you my love and tomorrow you will have something to read before you make your way to work.  I am forever dreaming of your insides and that they move and pulsate for me alone.  i give myself to only you

Alles für Sie immer
werden wir nie beenden”

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