topography

I felt you last night in my dream.

There was a baby bat motionless in the grass, it’s thin, silvery skin draped over a few inches of lawn.

I was so excited about picking it up with my trembling fingers and running into the house to show you this rare thing I had discovered…in the middle of the morning no less.

But as I bent down to pluck its quivering body from the damp blades, it flew away – in a stuttered, batty fashion – but it flew high and fast. I had no chance.

When I awoke in the morning, the details of the dream didn’t matter as much as the fact that you were the one I wanted to share the bat with.

It’s been so long since thoughts of you have visited me after sleep. I lied down and smothered myself in solemn masturbation, and dwelled on all of
the moments when I have felt so young and flightless in your presence. You’re the most intelligent, giving, and needlessly understanding person in my life. Around you, I am always born yesterday.

I had, and still have, no idea why you want to bother with me.

So often I struggled with what it was about me that
kept you interested.

And now I am the one

putting you in that position.

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